Blue

The color of the sky, tough now its suck a dark hue that it looks more black than anything else, summer is here and with it the rains that come with the passage of tropical storms.

I guess it's adequate that it's also the color more associated with depression.

It's been a good long time since I've felt really happy, since I had a good all out laugh, I spend most of time now felling inadequate, slow, dumb... It just doesn't matter how many things I get right, or how much success I attain, it seams that for every one of those, a dark cloud gets added on the horizon.

My leg got hurt, again, It's not that I resent my body falling me as I get older, I understand that, what gets me is that I got hurt on a bad decision, again, trying to fit in trying to ignore the fact that I've failed to shut my mouth and eat right. Now I've paid the price of denial.

I'll keep using this blog to vent, that's it only function, now with my latest track record, someone I don't want to will find it, one day I'll add it to my increasing list of poor choices...

Lost

Been feeling out of my game, not here, just sort of spaced out.

What good is it to have an over obsessive brain if you just can't point it in the right direction, or at the very least in a direction that has some sort of payoff.

Several days of being unable to function properly at work is just not gonna cut it, the focus for the poorly aimed brain right now is my love to consume anything that has to do with storytelling, so reading and watching TV is all I've been able to do.

I hope this journal helps at least take some of the obsessiveness off.